I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
