I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
then he tried to convert me to islam
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
