Where is the hickey?
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize