Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
