I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
