I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize