I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
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