She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
We have so much sex to catch up on
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
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