she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
