Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
being pregnant is like rehab
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
