I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
