peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
