Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
