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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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