I am puke
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
I enjoy the company of your penis
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
