how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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