It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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