Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
did you just send me my own nude
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
