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New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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