Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Randomize
