You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
