Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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