Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Randomize
