So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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