so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
