Do you still have your period?
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
