i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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