yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
