I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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