I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
