that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
