like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize
