i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Randomize
