false alarm. still invincible.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
