We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
