Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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