I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
