The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I think people are normalizing furries
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
