The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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