Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
