There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
