I'm at about main and main street
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
You are the jesus of drinking
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
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