My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
Randomize
