There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
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