I want to make a zoo with you.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
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