Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
