Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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