This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
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