We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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