Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
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